Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Exam!!!

Finally it comes to me this Saturday! Everyday study just for that freaking exam to come hehehe....so nothing much to post here and just wish me good luck ya=)

Saturday, January 07, 2006

This worst things again happen to me='(

I admit that i am way too much of telling this kind of things at this moment. i screwed up myself for waiting a girl for more than one year, is kinda sad for me not because i couldn't get her as a girlfriend but is the matter of the things i had been done in this pass one year she just can't see anyone of them. She really means a lot to me! A questions from her that why i still keep waiting for her so long and is that anything so special about her. I just couldn't give her proper answer that why and why. I just into her so much and i couldn't control, i think she will avoid me for sometime for me to "calm down" starting from now. But i thinks this will be ok with me since i never draw any attention to her. This week, i used hours looking at her from the back of the lecture hall just to console myself that she will realized that i will treat her very nice more than i can do to anyone around me but she just don't let me to show that how much i care about her and the other reason is that we will be skipped 3 months for industrial training and most likely i wont be seeing her for that long and i afraid that i will forget how she look within this period. Yesterday i told myself that i don't want to staring her from the back anymore if i really still want her mine i should talk to her whenever i like and wont ever avoid eye contact with her....yes, no more chicken here! Just go for it you got nothing to lose anymore yongjian! Althogh she told me that i am not the type she want but how could a girl ever tell u she might give u a chance before if she hated you so much. I think there is still a reason. I just want to figure out! So far i had been wating so long and now i really don't even have any interest towards other girls around me. I think i in trouble since the idea that keep waiting so long for this girl maybe is just an excuse for me to avoid myself get in to a realationship. I not kinda saddism she rejected me two days ago and i felt nothing to it and i just hope that i could do anything for her. Maybe treat her nicer than me myself and audience watever or whoever she is in love with and so so...i just don't mind to be a loser......